As we spent the day painting pebbles for a charity day in St abbs recently, I wandered around chatting to the fellow stall holders One fabulous lady whom I bought a few beachy bits from, said she had waited years for a beach hut , but it went to her relative and so she was selling her stuff for charity, the lifeboat here in the village., …. Guess who was happy to give the seaside paraphenallia a good home !!!
I got our things and she asked me if she could photograph my garden. She had walked past a few times. she knew it was mine she said … It had to be !! I was touched and thankful. It was of course, really complimentary. And they were a lovely family. They are in the gang..
Another woman walked up to the stall. I had seen her about in the village.. I knew that perhaps we had a similar taste in planting as both our gardens have thrived in the summer heat. I complimented this lady on her colourful skirt and top saying she looked nice and bright.. Imagine.. the surprise when the reply was.. Well I wish I could say the same about your house.. Ohh!! well, ‘That’s me told…….’. ‘Yes, she said,….. ‘I don’t like your house !!’
It isn’t what everyone has but really? Would you say it out loud!!
How easy would it be to wipe out that earlier lady’s comment? Or all those other nice comments we hear from people all the time? All the photos we get asked if people can take.. or the joy we can see when people see the achievement , just because of that ONE negative perspective?
BUT we do..
We all do. All the time. The tiny tiny bad bit becomes all we think about in the big scheme of things and it is madness. ( But normal!) We are so much more than the jealous, or sad, or lonely person who chooses to voice their feelings in that way and we happen to get in the way at that moment, on that day…
The other 67843 lovely comments are still true.. REALLY. !!! And at the end of the day.. Do I like my garden? Yes.. Does the kid growing up in it feel happy in it .. YES.. !!
Having gone through a long term situation where there was a LOT of negativity.. I try to remember how fleeting these random commentaries are.
The opinion of those we love.. yes, to a point.. but mostly if we are looking in the mirror and the person staring back is ok with the stuff we are doing/thinking/being… it’s probably enough..
Because I just don’t want to be anyone else.. And neither should you . All things which are different create a reaction..If nobody is harmed, affected or comprimised by your flourishing.. carry on….Be your own reference.
If you get negative comments….Don’t go back in your shell… Decorate it !!
Love Liz xx